Kreativ Blogger Award

I’ve been nominated for the Kreativ blogger award by fellow blogger-friend, J85 so I am fulfilling my duty with gratitude 🙂

Thank you for nominating me J85, it’s nice to be thought of!!

What I like about her blog are the vignettes about her life and her kids, I like reading about parents who love their kids and who take a vested interest in their family. That might be reflected in who I nominate just a little 😉

10 things about me…hmmm

1. I believe unless some aspect of your life involves contributing to good in the world in some way, you’re never going to be fulfilled.

2. Coronation Street on CBC is one of my favourite shows, it makes me miss the UK.

3. My blogger name comes from a derivative of my nickname, which is, monkey. My wife calls me this around the house, in grocery stores at the doctor’s office, everywhere…and I answer 😛

4. Sandwiches are by far my favourite food, sandwiches and steak…okay, sandwiches and steak and all things dessert-related…ok, I just can’t pick.

5. I wore boys clothes even as a child, as my youngest uncle isn’t much older than me, I looked pretty cute in his hand-me-downs.

6. Apart from right now, I’ve broken almost every toe on my right foot and half of my fingers and an arm.

7. 3 has always felt like a lucky number to me.

8. Orange is my favourite colour, you just can’t be unhappy in an orange room.

9. I’m gender non-conforming, it’s the best way for me to identify as a person who buys all their clothes in the men’s department but has the body parts for the women’s department. To be contrary, I like to identify as ‘neither’!

10. I hate, hate, hate shopping.

Since it took me forever to think of the list of 10, here are 5 bloggers I nominate:

1. http://raisingmyrainbow.com/

2. http://cauldronsandcupcakes.com/

3. http://duffelbagandadream.wordpress.com/

4. http://teaandtantalisingtales.wordpress.com/

5. buttercreamandchantilly.wordpress.com/

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Watch Your Language

Hey folks,

I’m planning a new blog! I like monkiss as unfocussed as it is from day-to-day, with art, personal stories and soap box stuff, the next one is devoted to a nerdy love of mine:

words!

I’m going to do a word a day with some photography to go with it…I think; photos from around my city.

Submit a blog title recommendation if you like. So far I’m using my wife’s feedback and we don’t seem to like each other’s suggestions – so far.

In times of danger

This is how you stay alive.

You think of Thich Nhat Hanh’s words:

“Just let go my dear”  needled in black ink on your forearm.

you think of the millions of cells fighting on your behalf,

synapses firing,

heart beating,

blood pumping

how dare you tear apart the work of the universe, it’s beauty is a miracle

you love and you wait

patience

cultivate waiting, time and beauty

dear Buddha

you were right

all we have is now.

all we need is love

all i want is you

Dreaming toward death

Sometimes, in the midst of depression, my safety devices are writing and my love for my wife.  

I want to be a breath away from fading into the sheets on my bed and into nothing.

Like that movie, A Neverending story, I feel like I’m in the nothing.

Then there’s the knowledge that death is very permanent and only seems like a distant pretty idea. Looks like it might work, looks like an option, but really, it isn’t…not at all…Almost like…communism?

My nails are dragging along the pages and keyboard, if I form them, I will stay, if I type, I am alive, I am here and I will stay.

It’s a sad commentary or the ramblings of a person who has managed chronic depression for 20 years, I have no idea which is more accurate.

It’s a beautiful sunny day – the sun is splitting the rocks, my grandfather would say. It’s 4 celsius but we haven’t seen a beautiful day like this in a long time. It makes my illness that much more, palpable, closer to the surface.

I am here, I am alive and for now, that is enough.